And now a word from everyone’s faaaa-vourite asshole!
Apropos of nothing, if I had my own late night talk show, that’s how I would insist on being introduced every night.
Anyway, I apologize for being incommunicado these past two weeks. I know, I know, you’ve lost sleep over it, right? No? Well, alright then. That’s probably as it should be since if your day was dependant on my blog posts then I would insist that you get out more.
Here’s why I’ve been as quiet as a meat and dairy lobbyist at a vegan food fare: our Internet has been down at home for six days now and I also broke a bone in my hand. I wish the reasons for these circumstances were a little more glamorous like I’m a prizefighter in my spare time or I no longer need the Internet to sign petitions because every animal has been freed. Sadly, no. Our Internet is down because Bell and Primus Canada suck giant balls and my hand is broken because I have the coping strategies of Charlie Sheen and I got angry and punched a door. I’m not proud but that’s a fairly typical feeling when it comes to the achievements in my life.
At least I can still type about twelve words minute.
My hand will be fixed April 13 (that’s when I have the cast removed) and we hope to have our Internet fixed before the Second Coming of Christ. I’ll be back with more rants and recipes just as soon as I can.
Thanks for your patience, understanding and continued readership.
P.S. The chicken pictured below (far right) perfectly captures the expression I’ve had this entire week in dealing with Primus and Bell Canada.